January 2012
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December 2011
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I have absolutely no plans for tonight.
I am not lame at all.
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I really should tell my brother I can perfectly hear him masturbate in his room from here.
It gets annoying.
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monsterhugs:
what if people in real life stopped in the middle of their sentences, said “READ MORE” and then started whispering under their breath
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Two things.
NUMBER ONE: Today I went swimsuit shopping because…well, I needed a swimsuit. And honestly, all swimsuit companies should just go fuck themselves because I have really nice boobs or so I believe but swimsuits just make them look weird and I do not appreciate that. Yeah. Obviously I still ended up getting one because I really need one, and I picked one that made me look almost human. Almost.
...
I only own two lipsticks.
One is red, the other one’s purple.
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I started watching Breaking Bad with my sister.
I know, kind of late, but that’s how I do stuff.
AAAAANYWAY
FACT #1: If a movie/TV series about my life is ever made (SHUT UP, THAT COULD HAPPEN! I would make it happen, mostly, but still), I want Bryan Cranston to play my dad.
FACT #2: I can’t get over his meth-making outfit.
FACT #3: Or the fact that he was Jerry’s dentist.
FACT #4: I forgot what I wanted to say.
FACT #5:...
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I like turning the snowflake option on Youtube on when watching Rufus Wainwright videos.
It makes it more… madge-ical magical.
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HOLY SHIT, BEN FOLDS FIVE REUNITED???!!!
HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS??????!!!!!!!!!!
BEST. NEWS. EVER.
These guys were FLAWLESS. FLAWLESS, I tell you.
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I want to be Kathy Bates when I'm older.
Not like her.
I want to be her.
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“Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing,...”
– Edgar Allan Poe (via eccentric-queen)
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My friend
is always trying to get me to join Tumblr.
I always tell her “I’m kind of busy..” or “I don’t understand it!” or “I wouldn’t know what to post!”.
Poor innocent soul.
I found out
the reason I’m such a terrible writer is that I’m a HUUUGE multitasker and an even bigger procrastinator.
Seriously. I’ve started like 6685668 novels and 4856749 scripts and I’ve only ever finished one.
And it’s not even that good.
“it is clear that I must find my other half, but is it a he, or a she? what does...”
– Hedwig and the Angry Inch (via theleavesoftrees)
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Why Bullies Are Stupid - Reason #1
They bully you about the stupidest things!!!
I remember in like, 8th grade or something, a girl used to tease me ALL THE TIME about having “crazy eyes” or something. She could have teased me about a MILLION other more embarrasing, negative things: the living creature that resides on top of my head that is commonly known as my hair, the fact that I can’t smile like a normal human...
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MY SISTER'S FRIEND SAID I HAVE RED HAIR!
AHHHH!!
IT’S MORE LIKE… BROWN!!
I mean, I always thought of it as a tiny bit reddish, but I didn’t want to say anything because people would think I’M CRAZY and I didn’t want to be dissapointed when people say it’s just plain brown.
BUT A PERSON HAS CONSIDERED IT RED SO I AM NOT CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!111
This has been a post.
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Me: Mom...Dad. I've decided to live on my own from now on.
Parents: Ok, cool.
Me: Your luggage is outside
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orientaltiger:
When you’re telling a story and then you realize that the other person was never really listening and your voice just fades away and then slink in your seat.
Oh.
This time it's fictional.: So I was watching Six... →
idyllictorture:
simpleton:
(I start pretty much every text post with that sentence but let’s just carry on…)
…and in one scene Keith was with the other lifeguards in a gay bar. Which is cool. Whatever.
….do you know what song was playing in the background?
…It was Thelma Houston’s Don’t Leave Me This Way.
…I like that…
The song is considered a gay anthem. I think that’s the connection. It...
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So I was watching Six Feet Under today...
(I start pretty much every text post with that sentence but let’s just carry on…)
…and in one scene Keith was with the other lifeguards in a gay bar. Which is cool. Whatever.
….do you know what song was playing in the background?
…It was Thelma Houston’s Don’t Leave Me This Way.
…I like that song.
….where else was that song playing?
Let...
What I got for Christmas:
a sore throat
…
…
…
…
too much stuff to get done and not enough time to do it
…
…
…
happiness, nevertheless.
when my sims sleep in the wrong bed
climbthroughthetide:
no you little dumbass I made your bedroom to specifically represent your personality why do you insist on sleeping there stop it at once young man you are a disappointment to this household
aaaaall the time :/
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I was rewatching
The Office UK’s Christmas Special this morning.
I desperately need a Tim in my life to tell me to never give up.
Without one, I’m afraid I just might.
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My dad just told me to go outside
…because the neighbours were listening to Adele.
What a guy.
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toysaremystory:
I do not like people I dislike liking the things I like.
I do not like people I like liking the things I like.
Most people do not like me.
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I've been cooking like a mad woman.
A birthday cake for my 3 year old cousin, a cheesecake for tonight, cranberry sauce, zabaione (to use up the egg yolks left from the cheesecake…).
I’ll gain SO MUCH weight tonight.
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AWKWARD.
I invited my friends over to the pool because it was really hot and sunny all week.
Today it’s kind of cold and windy and cloudy.
Also my best best friend isn’t coming because SHE SUCKS and so the only ones that are coming over are my sort-of-friends-but-not-so-close friends and so it’ll be VEEERY awkward, especially when the first one arrives because I’m so bad at making...
everyone else: i'm getting an ipad and a laptop and $300 worth of clothes and...
me: MASTER HAS GIVEN DOBBY A SOCK
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Funny how the stoners are always online early in the morning…
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