(wow is that how you spell “instincts”? it looks WEIRD).
Well anyway, in this post I mentioned I was going to go to a girl I knew from high school’s country house for the weekend. The plan was, go there and spend the day, go to this event downtown (this city is like an hour away from mine, so EEEVERYONE from my city goes there, which is A LOT of people) AND THEN we’d go clubbing (as would 90% of young people from both my city and this other city) and spend the night at her house. There would also be booze (A LOT of it), and the boyfriends of two girls would come over as well, along with like 10 friends each.
Given the tone of my previous post, I was obviously not looking forward to it. It wasn’t personal, I’m just not too fond on nightclubbing, let alone when half of the world’s population is trying to fit in one alcohol-stenched shithole. So, the previous day (Thursday) this other girl from high school tells me she doesn’t want to go clubbing either, so her dad would pick us up on Friday night (after we spend the afternoon there) and take us home (she lives in my same block, so it wouldn’t be a problem at all).
AAAANYWAY, Friday comes, I spend the day and I actually kind of have fun at the countryhouse. THEN we go downtown where EEEVERYBODY is, and that’s when things get, well, not so fun because I hate crowds and there was awful music playing and dirt everywhere and no. ANYWAY. You know the girl with whose dad I’d go home? Well, her boyfriend comes at about 8pm. He tells her, “you’re not going clubbing? LET’S GO CLUBBING!” and she’s like “okay”. At this point I’m staring at her because she’s my ride home…. so I tell her, “what about me? How am I supossed to go home?” and she’s like, “I don’t know, go clubbing too!” (let it be noted: I didn’t have much cash on me -club tickets are expensive that night-, or suitable clothes, my parents weren’t really cool with it, and the most important reason, I FUCKING HATE CLUBBING… I find it such an isolating experience, surrounded by drunk people who look like rapists and having my friends leave me alone to go make out with random drunk dudes, all set to godawful music…), and I’m like, “No, I’m not going clubbing.. How do I get home now?” and of course I’m raising my voice a little which takes her by surprise because I’m normally that girl in a group who everyone just fucks over and doesn’t give a shit about.
Well, she doesn’t do anything (we’re all standing in a circle). At this point I’m obviously pissed, with my hands in my pockets, trying not to cry (because I was SOOOO PISSED!). One of the girls (the countryhouse’s owner) walks up to her and asks her what’s going on and I overhear it, and so this other girl asks me if I want to go clubbing and I tell her I shouldn’t even have to be telling people whether I want to go clubbing or not because I had a ride home and everything was set up so no, I did not want to go clubbing. So nobody talks to me again and they just stand there talking to each other and meanwhile I’m trying to think if someone at my house will be able to drive an hour and pick me up because now there’s NO WAY I’m spending the night with these people who don’t give a fuck about me.
The thing that pisses me off the most, though, is how the girl who was supossed to be my ride home didn’t feel bad or anything. She was like, “Oh, sorry but I just decided to go clubbing just now!”, and I’m like I FUCKING KNOW THAT. THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE NOT A FUCKING AWFUL PERSON. YOU COMMITED TO TAKE ME HOME AND NOW I DON’T KNOW HOW I’LL GET HOME AND I’M STRANDED IN ANOTHER CITY WITH YOU PEOPLE WHO I HATE SO I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE PISSED.
Aaaanyway, given their level of maturity, she acted like I was the one overreacting and like I was nuts and a bitch for not wanting to go out and so nobody spoke to me again (except for this other girl who I’m closer with.. she did speak to me… but aside from that no one even looked at me). So we took the bus back to the countryhouse after the boyfriends’ friends arrived (who I had to greet with an enormous bitchface so they probably think I’m a fucking lunatic or something.. not that I give a shit but anyway) and the girls start showering and getting ready and the boys start drinking and stuff, and I’m sitting on a couch, alone, calling my parents.
Like an hour after my parents get there and I leave, saying bye only to the girl who spoke to me and the house’s owner.
I know I sound like a bitch, but I actually felt so horrible and when she told me she was going clubbing I had such a knot in my stomach all night and thank God my parents are awesome and could pick me up.
ANYWAY, I shouldn’t have gone there. Now I know it. And I’m not ever going to speak to this awful girl again.